Posted in the Oakland Tribune
Friday, May 23, 2003
Written by Oakland Tribune Staff

Oakland – Ten years in a refugee camp in India. Five years in East Bay homeless shelters. All seven of the East Bay College Fund scholars have inspiring stories of challenges and resilience. The experiences of Tsering Dorjee and Katie Jay are remarkable, even among this group.

“I was nervous,” Jay said about speaking before the audience at the scholarship awards ceremony at Mills College’s Carnegie Building. She didn’t seem nervous as she recounted what you can only call an incredible journey. She attended 32 schools, lived in 20 homeless shelters, is graduating from Castlemont High with a 3-point GPA and is heading off to San Jose State University, determined to be a medical doctor.

“I know how it is to be in shelters, to sleep in the car, not to be able to change my clothes,” she told the audience.

“At times, I felt I couldn’t make it another day. But that contributed to making me who I am today.” It started when she was 11 years old and her parents divorced.

She and her mother, Vanessa Jay, found themselves with no place to live.

“We were in and out of shelters and I changed schools every other month, sometimes every month,” Jay told me. She went to school in Fremont, Vacaville, Hayward, Oakland, Richmond, Vallejo and Antioch.

“It was hard, really hard. It was hard to start fresh. I had no marks, it was like I had flunked and had to start all over. After a while I got used to it.”

When she was in school in Fremont, her classmates would ask if they could come over; she always told them she had to visit them. Only her best friend knew she was living in a shelter.

The lowest point was in the ninth grade when she and her mother were forced to sleep in the car.

“I would have to go to a drop-in center to wash up before going to school,” Jay recalled.

“The police came by and asked what we were doing in the car.”

Somehow, amazingly, Jay never gave up. Now that her classmates know she was homeless, they tell her they never suspected it. She was known for her smile. She attributes her positive attitude to her mother.

“I saw how she overlooked the situation. She always said things will get better. Just keep praying and never give up hope.” Now, she passes that message along to the kids she works with in a mentoring program at the Brookfield library.

“A lot of them are from broken-up families and they act out because of that or their parents are on drugs.

“I tell them they don’t have to act out because of their parents’ situation. If they are surrounded by cursing, they don’t have to do that. Some of them come back and say thank you. They say if I could do it, it makes them think they can.”

Tsering Dorjee wore traditional Tibetan dress at the scholarship awards program. After his speech, he played the dragnyen, a Tibetan string instrument, and sang.

“This is kind of like a romantic song,” he said with a little smile. “To a girl.”

His niece, looking to be about 2 years old, hid behind him, peeked around his traditional skirt at the audience and eventually began to sing along with her version of the song.

The smiles on the faces of his mother, father, brother and sister couldn’t have been broader.

“I was born in a refugee camp in Dharamsala, India.” Dorjee said. They were Tibetan exiles and lived in the camp until he was 10. When they moved to the Bay Area in 1995, he was astounded by the diversity of the population.

“Asians, Blacks, Caucasians and Latinos. I had never seen anyone outside of the camp, just Indians and refugees. I never even knew there were so many different kinds of Asians.”

At Lakeview Elementary School, the other kids picked on him because of how he dressed and his inability to speak English.

“I saw I needed to speak English as soon as possible. I refused the negative comments and just talked to as many people as I could and read magazines and newspapers.”

Learning to speak was easier than learning to write and read. But he eventually mastered his new language and is graduating from Far West High School. He will attend Monterey Bay State University.

He is a member of a Tibetan traditional dance and music group that tours the United States and Canada and speaks out in support of the liberation of Tibet.

“My advice is that whatever problems you are facing, it’s important to speak with an elder who loves you and let them know what you are going through. My parents were not able to go to school beyond grade school, but they have a general knowledge that helped me.” After the ceremony, his relatives placed white silk scarves, the traditional celebratory katak, around his neck.

From homeless shelters and a refugee camp to college and beyond.

The East Bay College Fund, a new grassroots organization, offers four-year college scholarships, mentoring and other support services to promising East Bay public school students from low-income families. For more information about how you can contribute, call (510)658-7877.